1. Although beet juice is not traditionally considered a super food, some scientists believe that it should be. Move over blueberries, spinach, quinoa, kale, and salmon!!
2. Some research suggests that consuming 500 ml of beet juice approximately two and a half hours before an endurance event will significantly improve performance. Other research suggests that beet juice can also lower blood pressure.
3. A juicer can quickly transform a bundle of beets into a bottle of nutrient-rich goodness. But don’t just trash the greens! If you’re feeling adventurous, juice them up with the root. Or sauté them with some garlic and olive oil!
4. If you drop 32 oz. of freshly made beet juice on your kitchen floor, the result will resemble the most violent of crime scenes. Seriously. You will want to call in Dexter for a blood spatter analysis. I’m not kidding.
5. Your first response will be surrender. After one round of cleaning, your tile, refrigerator, cabinets, and counter will still have a healthy pink glow. By round three, only luminol will ever reveal what happened here. For a moment, you will fantasize that you could fool any forensics team. You will then spend the day horrified by the thoughts that sometimes pop into your head and vow to stop watching so much true crime television.
6. Only afterwards will you realize that you wasted a perfect opportunity for a self-portrait. You could have surprised your mother with it at Christmas. (You’ve never quite outgrown the desire to frighten and disturb her.)